Myth of the Given

Things you think of when painting your room. Turns out I'm still a Wilber's scout.

What is Three Times Theory?

Walter Iooss

As Polish philosopher Leszek Kolakowski once said, the best way to deal with your need is meeting it. If you want an apple, just go ahead and grab one. And deal with all the consequences.

Generally I share this view, but I think it applies best to first time experiences. I have a simple and special approach towards it. Enter Three Times Theory.

It is based on notion, that everything experienced for the first time is special. But that's not the whole story. Second times are very interesting as well, in my opinion undervalued. And there's this third time, which signals routine.

First time is so mind blowing because you're not able to scale it. What you have at your disposal is at best some partial report, dull info, naked data. That's why when it actually happens it's totally emotional. Even if disappointing, it can hardly be challenged. Suppose you have upgraded your Honda Civic to Lexus. As impressive as this promotion gets, it can't beat your initial jump from walking to driving. Can it?

Second time experience is more scalable. That's because the first time gave you some measures, tangible expectations of its limits, glimpse of insight. Whether it's a second job, second girlfriend or second drug use, comparison comes naturally. It's somehow new, but familiar.

Third time introduces cyclical nature of things, gives you the sense of understanding. From here you start being experienced. 

So happy is, I think, the one who had three houses, three spouses, and three jobs. Hey, but not at once! Let's not praise personality disorders. When you lived three lives, you can call yourself lucky. You've been testing your freedom. That guarantees minimized risk of anxiety, uncomfortable flashes, and insomnia later on. Well, at least it should help.  

5 rules of life in your twenties (that I should have followed)

Dagmar Hochová

I'd like to walk to my younger self and tell him a couple of things. I'm writing a book instead, hoping it will reach some folks with madness and hunger for life similar to mine. The general ideas are as follows: 

 1. Don't panic. 

We're doomed. That's generally true. But in the meantime we can be brave and happy. Sure, there's a small list of things you should avoid, like long term commitments (mortgage, marriage, kids), or life/health hazards (starting with suicide attempt, which sounds so sweet sometimes), but the message is: enjoy your freedom. And first of all - stay calm. 

2. Participate. 

Don't only think about things but breathe them, engage your sweat & blood. Be part of it, not apart. And over all: share with others. 

3. Anticipate. 

You have one source of income? Cool, work on another one. You love your partner? Marvellous, don't forget about your friends. You feel great with children? Awesome, just keep in mind they will be gone in 10 years. Get ready. 

4. Believe in your choices. 

Feeling you've landed somewhere or with someone by accident? How so? Everything you are now is either result of many decisions or just an inertial force. Let it better be decisions, your decisions. Listen to feedback, but don't let people sabotage your plans. Almost everyone has this inclination to give advices, not always with good will. And rarely with better knowledge of the situation than you have. 

5. Acknowledge that there's nothing as it seems. 

Appearances can really be misleading. Less is more, big is small, depends how much you research it. And be ready for surprises. Did you know that Jimi Hendrix was a very shy guy? Not to mention that Jack Nicholson was growing up with sister, that turned out to be... his mother. 

So the book should be ready at the latest in September. 

By the way, while wondering who publishes similar content I found a great site: http://fiverulesforlife.blogspot.co.uk/