"The Antidote"

There is a type of man that becomes a comedian, and there is a mountaineer. Speaking of the latter, it turns out that during expedition one risks his life much more than necessary. Studies have shown that many climbers tend to be obsessively attached to their previously set goals. Especially in Himalayas, in changed weather conditions or with injured member of a team, much appropriate flexibility is not there at all. Many climbers show extreme stubbornness in such situations. Target must be met and turning back is not an option. This specific syndrome has been called goalodicy. One of many discoveries of yet another book enlisted in anti-self-help genre, "The Antidote". 

But dangerous doctrine of achieving goals at all costs is not the main theme there. Author Oliver Burkeman focuses rather on glory of - wait for it - negative thinking, as opposed to global industry of positive thinking, positivity run amok, orthodoxy of optimism. In his journalistic journey the very rational Cambridge educated Brit provides an alternative attitude to self development.

What I found interesting was his interview with Eckhart Tolle. Not much what the self-appointerd sage said, but the hilarious, well written description of his thought. Entering Tolle's apartment journalist stumbled upon first obstacle.  Even ‘How are you?’, I had suddenly realised, was a potentially problematic opening question when the word ‘you’ – and what, exactly, that might mean – was the very thing I had come to discuss. Burkeman managed to deliver Tolle's message in surprisingly entertaining fashion, since the author of "The Power of Now" is not very charismatic. But the message is strong, and even sceptical Burkeman was under influence of peaceful atmosphere of the house. When is was over he noticed that he doesn't feel like going anywhere. Instead, he would prefer to enjoy the moment in silence for few more hours. And this time he wasn't ironic.

Another surprise came with a Buddhist retreat, which despite earlier doubts turned out to be worth recommending. Not identifying with thoughts, not identifying with ego opens a new perspective.

One of the strongest points the Author makes is this: our constant efforts to eliminate the negative – insecurity, uncertainty, failure, or sadness – that is what causes us to feel so insecure, anxious, uncertain, or unhappy. In a long run convincing yourself that you are someone else than you are, you're in a situation you're not, simply fails. As painful as naked truth might be, it's the only real path to progress.

I still have a lot more to say than this, so my work on "Maps" continues. 

Myth of the Given

Things you think of when painting your room. Turns out I'm still a Wilber's scout.

Immigrant's perspective

I'm coming back to vlogging, starting with a short impression about immigrant's feelings when in the UK.

Age of Abundance (or nerd in the park)

Seeing some Sci-Fi film ad on a London bus I felt suddenly embarrassed for all involved: producers, actors, designers, and so on. “They should be ashamed of themselves.” - I thought. “It hits low, pins to the flatland.” I really got carried away with disgust, as I was walking familiar streets in Zone 2. I kept on complaining in my mind. “It's trashing the culture. It's a waste of time, prayer to money.”

It might sound harsh. It might sound overly serious. But somehow I caught myself on that explicit judgement. Cause really, we would do without another movie. We would easily do without half of the movies made over the last 50 years.

What we generally need in the West is selection. Subtracting instead of adding, giving away instead of taking, letting go instead of gathering. For start try selling instead of buying.

We have a religion of collecting and upgrading. We produce the same films for decades, over and over again. How about setting up a religion of selection, or at least politics or business of selection.

Said someone who adds his blog to the noise, plus tweets, plus Facebook updates and YouTube videos. Oh well, whatever comes next.

I should probably stick to watching dogs running in the park. But no walk is innocent when you are a fatalist nerd.

What is Three Times Theory?

Walter Iooss

As Polish philosopher Leszek Kolakowski once said, the best way to deal with your need is meeting it. If you want an apple, just go ahead and grab one. And deal with all the consequences.

Generally I share this view, but I think it applies best to first time experiences. I have a simple and special approach towards it. Enter Three Times Theory.

It is based on notion, that everything experienced for the first time is special. But that's not the whole story. Second times are very interesting as well, in my opinion undervalued. And there's this third time, which signals routine.

First time is so mind blowing because you're not able to scale it. What you have at your disposal is at best some partial report, dull info, naked data. That's why when it actually happens it's totally emotional. Even if disappointing, it can hardly be challenged. Suppose you have upgraded your Honda Civic to Lexus. As impressive as this promotion gets, it can't beat your initial jump from walking to driving. Can it?

Second time experience is more scalable. That's because the first time gave you some measures, tangible expectations of its limits, glimpse of insight. Whether it's a second job, second girlfriend or second drug use, comparison comes naturally. It's somehow new, but familiar.

Third time introduces cyclical nature of things, gives you the sense of understanding. From here you start being experienced. 

So happy is, I think, the one who had three houses, three spouses, and three jobs. Hey, but not at once! Let's not praise personality disorders. When you lived three lives, you can call yourself lucky. You've been testing your freedom. That guarantees minimized risk of anxiety, uncomfortable flashes, and insomnia later on. Well, at least it should help.  

5 rules of life in your twenties (that I should have followed)

Dagmar Hochová

I'd like to walk to my younger self and tell him a couple of things. I'm writing a book instead, hoping it will reach some folks with madness and hunger for life similar to mine. The general ideas are as follows: 

 1. Don't panic. 

We're doomed. That's generally true. But in the meantime we can be brave and happy. Sure, there's a small list of things you should avoid, like long term commitments (mortgage, marriage, kids), or life/health hazards (starting with suicide attempt, which sounds so sweet sometimes), but the message is: enjoy your freedom. And first of all - stay calm. 

2. Participate. 

Don't only think about things but breathe them, engage your sweat & blood. Be part of it, not apart. And over all: share with others. 

3. Anticipate. 

You have one source of income? Cool, work on another one. You love your partner? Marvellous, don't forget about your friends. You feel great with children? Awesome, just keep in mind they will be gone in 10 years. Get ready. 

4. Believe in your choices. 

Feeling you've landed somewhere or with someone by accident? How so? Everything you are now is either result of many decisions or just an inertial force. Let it better be decisions, your decisions. Listen to feedback, but don't let people sabotage your plans. Almost everyone has this inclination to give advices, not always with good will. And rarely with better knowledge of the situation than you have. 

5. Acknowledge that there's nothing as it seems. 

Appearances can really be misleading. Less is more, big is small, depends how much you research it. And be ready for surprises. Did you know that Jimi Hendrix was a very shy guy? Not to mention that Jack Nicholson was growing up with sister, that turned out to be... his mother. 

So the book should be ready at the latest in September. 

By the way, while wondering who publishes similar content I found a great site: http://fiverulesforlife.blogspot.co.uk/